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其他 — Margaret Wheatley:“情愿被搅扰”

2021-02-19 15:41:05

As we work together to restore hope to the future, we need to include a new and strange ally—our willingness to be disturbed. Our willingness to have our beliefs and ideas challenged by what others think. No one person or perspective can give us the answers we need to the problems of today. Paradoxically, we can only find those answers by admitting we don’t know. We have to be willing to let go of our certainty and expect ourselves to be confused for a time.

在我们一起修复未来希望之际,我们需要纳入陌生的新联盟——心甘情愿被搅扰。愿意让别人挑战我们的信仰与观点。没有哪一个人也没有哪一种观点可以为我们提供当今问题所需的答案。荒谬的是,我们只有承认自己无知之后,才能找到那些答案。我们必须得心甘情愿地放弃自己的确定性,预期自己有段时间会困惑。

We weren’t trained to admit we don’t know. Most of us were taught to sound certain and confident, to state our opinion as if it were true. We haven’t been rewarded for being confused. Or for asking more questions rather than giving quick answers. We’ve also spent many years listening to others mainly to determine whether we agree with them or not. We don’t have time or interest to sit and listen to those who think differently than we do.

可我们所受的训练并不是让我们承认自己无知。我们大多数人学的都是如何听上去言辞凿凿,充满自信,陈述自己观点时把它当成真得一样。感到困惑可得不到任何奖励。提更多问题而不是迅速给出答案,也是如此。这么多年,我们听别人说话主要是为了搞清楚我们是否同意他们的观点。我们没时间也没兴趣坐下来聆听异己分子说话。

But the world now is quite perplexing. We no longer live in those sweet, slow days when life felt predictable, when we actually knew what to do next. We live in a complex world, we often don’t know what’s going on, and we won’t be able to understand its complexity unless we spend more time in not knowing.

可眼下,这个世界让人相当纳闷。我们不再生活在那个甜美舒缓、生活可以预测我们也知道下一步是什么的时代。我们在复杂世界生存,通常搞不清状况也不理解其复杂性,除非我们花更多时间研究我们的无知。

It is very difficult to give up our certainties—our positions, our beliefs, our explanations. These help define us; they lie at the heart of our personal identity. Yet I believe we will succeed in changing this world only if we can think and work together in new ways. Curiosity is what we need. We don’t have to let go of what we believe, but we don need to be curious about what someone else believes. We do need to acknowledge that their way of interpreting the world might be essential to our survival.

放弃确定性——我们的职位、我们的信仰、我们的解释——非常困难。这些东西有助于界定我们;它们位于我们个人身份的核心之处。但我相信只有当我们以新方式思考合作时,我们才能成功地改变这个世界。求知欲正是我们所要的。我们不必放弃自己的信仰,但我们的确需要对别人的信仰感兴趣。我们确实需要承认他们阐释世界的方式对我们的生存可能是不可或缺的。

We live in a dense and tangled global system. Because we live in different parts of this complexity, and because no two people are physically identical, we each experience life differently. It’s impossible for any two people to ever see things exactly the same. You can test this out for yourself. Take any event that you’ve shared with others (a speech, a movie, a current event, a major problem) and ask your colleagues and friends to describe their interpretation of that event. I think you’ll be amazed at how many different explanations you’ll hear. Once you get a sense of diversity, try asking even more colleagues. You’ll end up with a rich tapestry of interpretations that are much more interesting than any single one.

我们居住在息息相关的全球系统中,因为我们生活在这种复杂性的各个部分,因为没有两个人性质完全相同,我们每个人的生活体验也都不尽相同。任何两个人即使看的是同样的东西,其观点也不可能完全一致。这个你可以自己试验。以你和他人分享的任何东西(演讲、电影、时事、关键问题)为例,让你的同事和朋友阐释他们对事件的理解。我想,听到各种解释差别之大,你会感到吃惊。一旦你对多样性有所了解,你可以尝试问问更多同事。你得到的丰富多样的阐释,会比任何单个阐释有趣得多。

To be curious about how someone else interprets things, we have to be willing to admit that we’re not capable of figuring things out alone. If our solutions don’t work as well as we want them to, if our explanations of why something happened don’t feel sufficient, it’s time to begin asking others
about what they see and think. When so many interpretations are available, I can’t understand why we would be satisfied with superficial conversations where we pretend to agree with one another.

为了对别人的阐释感兴趣,我们必须得承认我们无法独自理解事情。如果我们的解决方案不如预期的管用,如果我们不能充分解释某事发生的原因,我们就该询问其他人的看法和观点。当有如此之多的解释时,我不理解为什么我们应该对那些假装我们意见一致的肤浅谈话感到心满意足。

There are many ways to sit and listen for the differences. Lately, I’ve been listening for what surprises me. What did I just hear that startled me? This isn’t easy – I’m accustomed to sitting there nodding my head to those saying things I agree with. But when I notice what surprises me, I’m able to see my own views more dearly, including my beliefs and assumptions.

坐下来聆听不同意见的方法多种多样。最近,我一直在听让我惊讶的东西。我刚听到让我震惊的是什么呢?这可不简单——我已经习惯了坐在那里对我认可的人点头称是。但是,当我注意到让我惊奇的东西,我就能够更深入地了解自己的观点,包括我的信仰和假设。

Noticing what surprises and disturbs me has been a very useful way to see invisible beliefs. If what you say surprises me, I must have been assuming something else was true. If what you say disturbs me, I must believe something contrary to you. My shock at your position exposes my own position. When I hear myself saying, “How could anyone believe something like that?” a light comes on for me to see my own beliefs. These moments are great gifts. If I can see my beliefs and assumptions, I can decide whether I still value them.

一直以来,注意到让我吃惊让我不安的东西是非常有用的看到隐形信仰的方式。如果你说的内容让我震惊,我肯定是假设了其他东西是正确的。如果你所说的触动了我,我肯定是相信与你相左的观点。我对你的观点感到震惊其实也暴露了我的观点。当我听见自己说,“怎么有人有那种想法?”然后有一道光照亮了我自己的观点,让我看个清楚。这些都是宝贵的礼物。如果我可以看到自己的观点和假设,我就可以决定是否继续重视它们。

I hope you’ll begin a conversation, listening for what’s new. Listen as best you can for what’s different, for what surprises you. See if this practice helps you learn something new. Notice whether you develop a better relationship with the person you’re talking with. If you try this with several people, you might find yourself laughing in delight as you realize how many unique ways there are to be human.

我希望你能够开始一场对话,听听新东西。尽量听不同观点,听让你讶异的东西。看看下面的方法能否帮你学习新事物。留意你是否和你与之对话的人培养了更好的关系。如果你在几个人身上小试牛刀,随着你意识到做人竟然有那么多与众不同的方式,估计你得开怀大笑了。

We have the opportunity many times a day, everyday, to be the one who listens to others, curious rather than certain. But the greatest benefit of all is that listening moves us closer. When we listen with less judgment, we always develop better relationships with each other. It’s not differences that divide us. It’s our judgments about each other that do curiosity and good listening bring us back together.

一天,甚至每天,我们都有许多机会成为听众,充满好奇而不是确信无疑。不过,最大的好处是这种聆听拉近我们彼此之间的距离。当我们不带那么多是非判断来聆听时,我们之间能够培养出来更美好的关系。分开我们的不是差异,乃是我们对彼此的论断,而求知欲和认真聆听重新将我们聚在一起。

Sometimes we hesitate to listen for differences because we don’t want to change. We’re comfortable with our lives, and if we listened to anyone who raised questions, we’d have to get engaged in changing things. If we don’t listen, things can stay as they are and we won’t have to expend any energy. But most of us do see things in our life or in the world that we would like to be different. If that’s true, we have to listen more, not less. And we have to be willing to move into the very uncomfortable place of uncertainty.

有时我们害怕听到异议,因为我们不想改变。我们习惯了自己的生活,如果听到别人提出的问题,我们就得纠结于改变。如果我们不听,事情就会保持原样,我们不用花费任何精力。不过,我们大多数人也确实看到生活中或者这个世界上我们希望改变的东西。果真如此,我们必须得多听,而不是少听。而且,我们还必须得进入不确定性这种超级不舒服的状态。

We can’t be creative if we refuse to be confused. Change always starts with confusion; cherished interpretations must dissolve to make way for the new. Of course it’s scary to give up what we know, but the abyss is where newness lives. Great ideas and inventions miraculously appear in the space of not knowing. If we can move through the fear and enter the abyss, we are rewarded greatly. We rediscover we’re creative.

如果我们拒绝产生困惑,就无法创新。改变通常都源自困惑;珍爱的阐释必须消失才能为新说法让路。当然,放弃我们知道的东西令人恐惧,但柳暗花明又一村。伟大的想法和发明奇迹般地出现在未知空间。如果我们穿越恐惧,进入深渊,我们会得到丰厚的回报。我们会发现自己充满创造力。

As the world grows more strange and puzzling and difficult, I don’t believe most of us want to keep struggling through it alone, I can’t know what to do from my own narrow perspective. I know I need a better understanding of what’s going on. I want to sit down with you and talk about all the frightening and hopeful things I observe, and listen to what frightens you and gives you hope. I need new ideas and solutions for the problems I care about. I know I need to talk to you to discover those. I need to learn to value your perspective, and I want you to value mine. I expect to be disturbed by what I hear from you. I know we don’t have to agree with each other in order to think well together. There is no need for us to be joined at the head. We are joined by our human hearts.

世界日益光怪陆离,令人困惑,举步维艰,我相信大多数人不想独自抗争。从自己狭隘的视角,我无法知道该做什么。我知道我需要对周围正发生的有更深刻的认识。我想坐下来谈谈我观察到的所有令人害怕的事情,也谈谈充满希望的事情,也想听听什么让您害怕,什么让您满怀希望。我关心的问题需要新思路新出路。我知道我得跟您交谈才能发现这些内容。我需要学会重视您的观点,我也希望您重视我的观点。我期待您的观点能够触动我。我知道,我们可以和而不同。我们不需要用头脑连接,我们彼此心连心。

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